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Dealing with Hurtful People

Dealing with Hurtful People

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We live in a community. Sooner or later, someone will hurt us.

Whenever I talk about acceptance and surrender, one question that inevitably comes up  is ‘so then how do I deal with this person who is hurting me, do i just stop reacting? Won’t they hurt me more if I stop giving it back? Won’t their egos get bigger?’

It is a relevant question, and one of the hardest life lessons to learn is effectively dealing with those who are hurting us.

It is about you, not them

The first, hardest thing to embrace is that whatever problem it is, it isn’t about that other person. No matter how vindictive, how sick, idiotic or sadistic they have been, it is your own negativity they are reflecting back to you. The whole world is your mirror, and every person reflects back an aspect of you. Some reflect back the nice sides, some the unpleasant. But it is all just you.

Now, one thing to watch out for here, is the tendency to be harsh on yourself. When this realization strikes deeply, one tends to take all the hatred they’ve been directing towards others and turn it inwards. This isn’t going to help. Skip it.

Don’t give your power away

Whenever you insist that someone else needs to change for you to be happy, you are giving your power away. Essentially, you are saying that you refuse to be happy until this person you hate, changes. Does that look like a sensible quest to you?

Let go of Right vs Wrong

It is when we are stuck with ‘I am right and this person is wrong. Look at how ridiculous his/ her actions are’ when it is the hardest to heal. If you are going around seeking confirmation from people that this person IS horrible, you will lose out on the opportunity to transcend the mess and be happy.

It doesn’t matter how many people agree that the person who is bothering you is being ridiculous and needs to change. If you give your power away, then they are in charge and you are hostage.

So, then what next?

No matter what the situation, a problem arises only when we are unable to handle the way this person is making us feel. Once we understand this, we can focus on resolving our emotions, instead of asking the other person to change.

Does that mean I shouldn’t react?

When we react to situations, we are letting our emotions control us. When we respond to a situation, we are letting our wisdom guide us, and doing whatever makes sense. Both the reaction and response might be the same action sometimes.

If someone is hitting you, for example, it may be sensible to fight back, kick and slap. If you do this as a reaction, then your mind will cloud up, prevent you from thinking clearly, and also create emotional trauma for both of you. If you respond, you will be more stable and calm.

Resolving emotions and learning to respond

You will only start to heal the situation, when you take complete ownership for the mess. This is rarely easy, because it is much more convenient for the ego to put the blame on the other person.

 Sit with your feelings. If you wish to resolve the issues, spend some time everyday, sitting with how this person makes you feel. Close your eyes, and visualize the person/ situation and allow yourself feel whatever comes up. Avoid blaming or trying to come up with an explanation. Just feel.

Then do it with them. Once you have some practice with surrendering to your pain, you can do it when you are with the person too. Remind yourself that this is not them but their pain acting through them. And allow yourself to feel everything you feel in that moment.

Bear in mind. Surrendering to your feelings does not mean that you scream and shout as you please. Screaming and shouting are reactions that come up when you are trying to avoid your feelings. When you focus on feeling, you may not say much and if you do, it will be effective.

Meditation is Death

Meditation is Death

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So many I know, are very concerned about having to return to the earth after we die. When I speak to people, many tell me that they are on the spiritual path because ‘I don’t want to come back after I die’.

At one level, this may be a good thing. They’ve realized the basic truth propounded by Gautama Buddha – ‘life is suffering’, at least to some extent. While it might be a nice fantasy to imagine never coming back after dying, never having to suffer again, it doesn’t come easy.

Death isn’t just about the body collapsing one day, and the heart ceasing to beat. You don’t have to wait that long, to never return. You can do that this instant. Because you are dying right now.

Have you read about the process that the ‘soul’ goes through after death? What happens? The first few moments, unless you were really resisting death, are usually bliss. The white light, maybe the angels, the peace. And then all the memories come back. There is a quick recap of every important incident in your life.

Important incidents aren’t just the wedding and the birth of your children, or that occasional award at work. They include that incident when your neighbour’s dog chewed up your imported shoes and they were unapologetic. Or that moment when you read about a rapist and wanted him to be castrated. Or worse…

Everything that triggered an emotional incident is an important event. And it is when you go through this, that you want to come back. You want to come back, to teach that neighbour a lesson. To teach that rapist a lesson. To undo the mistakes you yourself have made. To apologise, to punish.

But you don’t have to wait that long. Death is in this moment. Who do you want to apologise to, now? Who do you want to see punished, now? What are the lessons you want your loved ones to learn? How badly do you want these things? Would you be willing to let that go? Would this person who has these desires, be willing to die? Are you choosing to come back to the world again, this moment? Why will things be different when you leave this body, then?

And this is why, meditation is death. It helps you die before you leave your body. Just like in death, when meditation is deep enough, it brings up everything that binds you. So, instead of grappling with issues in another life, you grapple with them in meditation, and learn to let them go. Every regret, every resentment, every dream, every desire will eventually have to go, even the desire to never return.

Die. It is absolutely, the only way to live.

Are you just a pawn?

Are you just a pawn?

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The whole pathetic Vogue empower furore hasn’t died down yet, and now they have something new, a minister’s allegedly racist comments, to fight about. And as I read the indignant, angry comments on social media, I don’t see rationale. I see hypnosis.

Intellectuals are Easier to Hypnotize

When I was learning hypnotherapy, I found I was always aware of my surroundings. I remember seeing a past life where I was being killed. As I narrated that they were now throwing my body into a lake, I paused and told my therapist ‘would you turn down the light, please? It’s hurting my eyes’. And I thought, how’s this even possible?

I told my teacher I was probably too intelligent to be hypnotized. He smiled. ‘The higher your IQ, the more hypnotizable you are’, he said. I know this to be true now. Nobody is more hypnotized than the intellectual class – because nobody else believes their mind more.

And the more hypnotisable you are, the more you can be used, by everyone else. Today, the one doing the most using is the media. If you consider yourself an intellectual, chances are pretty high that you are merely a pawn in the hands of the media.

A simple look at the AAP versus BJP supporter fights will reveal this to you. Every so often, both sides will make valid, reasonable points. The other side refuses to see it, blinded by their own opinions. It is too scary to be proven wrong, because we look down upon stupidity. Such a pity this is, because instead of opening our eyes and looking at reality, we’re fighting to support our favorite party, ignoring their faults. Is the party here to serve you, or are you here to serve the party?

Think you know better?

The more a person thinks that he is knowledgeable and knows a lot, and that his opinion counts, the more stuck he is. And the easier it is to manipulate him.

It is so easy to see how the media is using people these days. Just pick a silly topic and make a big deal out of it. And thousands, nay, millions of ‘intellectuals’ will jump straight in and join you in making it a ‘trending topic’. This is how easy it is for the media to divert your attention from important issues that need your attention. They just count on how awesome you think your opinion is.

Wake up

As long as you take your mind seriously, you are trapped. If you identify with your opinions, you are easy to manipulate – by your mind as well as by others. Don’t. It is just an opinion, and an opinion is nothing but a conclusion formed by looking at a few sides of the story. We never have the complete story. Never.

When you are able to read/ view something without getting pulled into the drama, you will be able to see through it without getting manipulated. This needs regular meditation of course, but it’s an effort that is totally worth it’s while.

So, wake up, open your eyes. April 1 is gone, no need to be a fool anymore.

The Bane of Social Media

The Bane of Social Media

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An average person checks email 30 times an hour when at work.

For a spiritual aspirant in the modern age, I think one of the biggest traps is the social media. There are two aspects to this. The attention span, and the desire to listen/ speak.

The Dangerously Low Attention Span

Many zen masters insist on developing deep, intense concentration before they impart any serious knowledge. This is because a flickering mind can accomplish very little.

We, on the other hand, have spent years programming our minds to process as little as possible. The advent of television had already reduced our attention spans to just 12 seconds – Notice how not a single shot on tv will last more than 6-8 seconds. If nothing else, they switch the angle. This makes sure your mind is engaged only for those many seconds. Today, the average attention span of internet surfers is 8 seconds. One second less than that of a goldfish.

We Speak. We don’t Listen

We are now a society where everyone wants to be heard, and no one wants to listen. Earlier, when we sat down for a chat we had to listen. At the most we’d have a cup of coffee in our hands, but apart from that, there was just us and the person we were talking to, no distractions. Have you stopped to observe what our communication today is like?

We’re on a phone call and we’re texting at the same time. Even worse, while driving. We’re skyping, but we’re surfing the web as we talk. Observe really carefully the next time this happens and you’ll realise – you’re not paying any attention at all.

Face it. We don’t actually care. We have no interest in really listening to the stories our loved ones are telling us. We are interested in listening to the extent of reinforcing our identities. For example, if you support a ban on animal slaughter, then you’ll pay a tad more attention to a page or a person supporting your views, than you would to something against it.

How this is Hurting Us

When nobody is listening, conversations become redundant. You talk about something, then talk about it again, and then repeat the same story yet again, and it is still not satisfying. So then we go blog about it, post it on facebook, twitter, instagram and what not, and we’re still not satisfied. Because no one is listening.

Add this fact to the shortening attention span, and it makes things even more difficult. You cannot listen, even if you are interested, even if this is your child talking about a tough day at school or something more painful.

It’s not Hard to Change

Mediation cannot be just an item on your schedule. It has to be a way of life, something you practice every moment.

Stop glorifying multi-tasking. There is nothing cool about multi-tasking. The brain cannot multi-task, and there are gaps between switching tasks, where it is doing nothing at all. This means that the more you switch between tasks, the less efficiently you will be using your brain.

Do one thing at a time, until you are finished. When you are reading an article, for instance, if you have a sudden urge to check your email, watch that desire and drop it. When you are having a conversation, do nothing else, respect the person who’s trying to talk to you.

Here’s an article I found very interesting: You’re Distracted: This Professor can Help

Men vs Women: Sensible?

Men vs Women: Sensible?

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What happened to happy couples?
What happened to love?

There’s a video doing rounds recently (My Choice), where Deepika Padukone proudly declares that she can do what she likes, it is her choice, thank you very much. And that includes having sex outside marriage. I was a bit surprised when I saw the video, but what disturbed me even more was when women I thought of as strong, started happily sharing it on Facebook.

We all want to be men

We’ve lost it, I think, in this whole war between men and women. It is like saying ‘you’ve been an idiot all along, and now you cannot stop me from being an idiot too’. Awesome.

In this drive for feminism, it is uncool to be a woman. Everyone wants to be a man. A woman wants to wear the pants, literally and figuratively. Well, great, but then who’s going to be wearing the skirts? So many women today are not ‘women’ anymore. Women eventually become mothers, who are symbols of nourishment and unending love. Do the women today nourish? They’re too busy neglecting their families and leaving their kids in the care of parents and maidservants in pursuit of their careers. They’re too busy trying to have it all – work, travel, looks, marriage AND kids. Usually, it is the kids who get the raw end of the deal. But hey! In a multi-income family, at least they have enough toys.

What else did we expect?

This is understandable though. Through several generations now, women have been on the receiving end and suffered immensely. Now they’re tired of having to put up with all the suppression, and are hitting back. Men can’t handle that someone they took for granted for centuries is now not the same anymore. Everyone is just acting out their pain, and inflicting pain on everyone else with the excuse that they’ve had it for so long.

Don’t turn the tables

To turn and bite back is NOT the solution. As a therapist, I have more male clients being tortured by their wives, than female clients being tortured by their husbands. It is unfair to draw conclusions only from my clientele, but at least, we know that such things exist.

So many women today want to marry a rich guy, stop working, and go parlor-hopping. They don’t want to cook or clean or care for the man in any other way. And when the man wants to leave because he finds that she wants a husband but has no interest in being a wife, she throws a couple of court cases in his face, drags his whole family to court, and demands alimony. I have even seen a woman beat her husband up in a court house. What about these men? Don’t they have any rights? Don’t they deserve justice and happiness?

Pain is Pain

It doesn’t matter who is in pain. If men are pained, they will pass it on to women. If women are in pain, they will pass it on to men. How do we stop the cycle? By looking inwards and healing ourselves. Pointing fingers won’t get us anywhere.

So yes, go ahead and do things that you want to do – whether you are a man or a woman. It is your choice. But are your choices driven by love or fear? Do you want to wear short skirts because you really want to, or is it to rebel? Do you tell your wife not to wear short skirts out of love or because you want her to do your bidding? Acting out of love will create situations where love can grow. Acting in fear or with a desire to control will only create a bigger mess.

We can’t exist without the other

We want freedom. But what about the freedom of a woman to stay at home and care for her children – is that really possible without a man? What about a man who wants to be able to dedicate his life to a career – can he really succeed without a woman to look after his needs? Or even vice versa.

We can’t get anywhere without love. Yes you want your freedom, but you can only be so free if all you care about is yourself. If you really want freedom, you’re going to have to sacrifice, irrespective of whether you are a man or a woman. Sometimes, that means letting your child have the last slice of pie. Sometimes it means sacrificing a career. Or a promotion. Or other desires. But when the sacrifice comes because YOU want to do it, and not because you are afraid of your spouse or the society, then you know that you have come of age.

Men and women aren’t that different. We are human beings first. And it will serve us well to remember that.

Leaving Footprints

Leaving Footprints

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Image from MountainPhotography.com

One of the questions that seems to plague most of educated mankind today, is ‘what is the purpose of my life?’. I’ve often asked people what the world would be like, if every sweeper, every grocer, clerk, driver, or even every seed that ends up on your plate, every tree, asked this same question?

Life is so powerful, you have no choice but to live out your purpose. Sometimes a part of this purpose, can be feeling lost and purposeless. However, I came across a beautiful post the other day, where a man, Chris Moody, shared a personal story in this context.

They used to go camping as a family, during the holidays. They’d pull into a campsite in a trailer and usually stay a week.

Says he, “After parking and leveling the trailer, we would get out landscaping tools, make rain trenches, trim branches, pull weeds, and pick up every cigarette butt, candy wrapper, bread tie, etc., and get the campfires going. We enjoyed the campsite for all its glory, cleaning every day after supper. All 5 of us kids had a chore.

I hated chores…took away from bike riding, fishing, long walks…ugh! Hated chores!

On check-out day, after hooking em up but just before heading out, we cleaned up every soda can tab, candy wrapper, bread tie, etc., trimmed branches, pulled weeds, raked up the campsite.

One time, during my smartass punk teen days, I made the remark that we work too hard to clean up, why can’t we just leave it like this.

I remember my dad looking at me not believing I would ask such a question, he said to me that this place was here for everyone to enjoy. ‘Always leave it better than you found it.’  

So, my fellow practitioners, let me ask you this. In your final hours, what will be the epitaph of your existence?“

Wow. What a beautiful lesson. Isn’t this really the purpose of every life? Every being apart from humans, leaves the world better than it found it. A seed becomes a tree, nourishing thousands of lives. Or it becomes food, nourishing at least one. Or it rots and becomes manure, helping another seed grow. Every bird, every animal, every insect leaves a little footprint, does it’s part to keep the world moving.

What can you do to add your bit? Well, what can be better than bringing more presence into the world? Bringing a little more love, a little more kindness and a little more joy? Why wait until the end of your life, do you leave everything and everyone that touches you, a little better than you found it?

Journeying into Meditation -III

Journeying into Meditation -III

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Journeying into nothingness

As we’ve realised by now, meditation makes one more and more intimate with our minds. We slowly identify more and more, how the mind keeps us trapped through repetitive patterns.

One might think that more physically oriented spiritual paths, such as yoga, might be more grounding, but I haven’t seen this to be the case. Yes, it makes the body more stable and sturdy, but the mind knows how to work it’s way around most situations.

So, you’re unaffected now?

One of the most common things to happen in the beginning stages is this indifference to all things around. ‘I am so happy now, nothing affects me anymore!’ I cannot count the number of times I have heard this from those starting their journey. But this, usually, is far from the truth. They are just affected in a different way.

When there is an imbalance in the body, an overpowering of the third eye will lead to a weakness in the hara chakra, which is the feeling center. So feelings disappear. One goes into a zone where no external circumstances seem to cause any stir inside. It is such bliss after having swung from one emotion to another for so long.

When the third eye starts to open and it becomes more and more easy to ‘see’ things, and to see through things. For example, if a person doesn’t like you and is trying to fake a smile, you will know. And this is where the trap lies.

An open third eye without the balancing effects of the heart and the hara, is just the ability to see everything, without compassion, without empathy. Such people either become rude or oversensitive, losing the capacity to tolerate ‘fake’ or unintelligent people. This harshness isn’t directed only outwards. Eventually, it becomes self-directed too, making the person extremely self-critical. Depression becomes a common state of mind.

What is the point, if the journey you started so you could merge with the universe, eventually just creates more separation, makes you feel more superior to everyone else?

Witness…

Turn back to the heart and the hara. This is also why the presence of a guru helps, or the presence of a friend along the spiritual path – because someone who is observing you will catch the ego wrapping you in it’s grip again.

Whatever reaction the mind throws up, is just a reaction, and shouldn’t be paid heed to. No matter which path you choose, there will be traps. This is what you need to keep in mind, that’s all. If you forget about awareness at any point, then you might react to life situations and get caught up in the mind again.

Remember that the mind is just one. Doesn’t matter if it is yours or someone else’s. The reactions are all the same, just varying based on the planetary positions, and life circumstances. So when you’re having a boring or exasperating conversation with someone, it is just your mind reacting to another mind’s reaction. When you truly learn to rise above the mind, you rise above both – your own mind, as well as the mind of the person in front of you. 

Journeying Into Meditation – II

Journeying Into Meditation – II

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… continued from part 1

When we think of meditation, we think peace. Surely, all these people, spending years and years in silence and meditation, must be peaceful? Well, maybe not. I wouldn’t necessarily call my tryst with meditation ‘peaceful’, and I have reason to believe that I am not alone. What I write below is not by any means detailed information about meditation – I merely recount the trips and the traps I’ve observed so far.

What is Meditation? 
A google search on meditation will bring up hundreds of guided visualisations. Guided visualisations are great as a preparatory tool for meditation, but they are not meditation at all. Any system that uses the mind cannot really be meditation. It is, however, a great starting point – and it helps one feel peaceful – one carrot that most spiritual aspirants spend their lives chasing.

There are many spiritual paths and people might define meditation differently. To me, meditation is being more present in the body, and in the moment.

One of the most effective methods I have found, is body awareness. All stresses are stored in the body. Becoming more deeply present in the physical body brings to our awareness the stresses in our body, and we can eventually let them go.

What I’ve Learned
One of the first things I understood was that almost no spiritual aspirant is on the path for enlightenment. We are all in it because our sense of self has been damaged in some way, and we think that ‘getting enlightened’ will somehow redeem us. Anyhow, something happens in life that turns a mind that is usually focused outside, inwards.

The first experience is usually peace. The outer world brings too many distractions, too many triggers, and when one first turns inwards, there is a very nice peace – it is like closing the curtain on the chaos of the world.

When you enter a dark room after a walk in bright sunshine, the first reaction is usually relief, and darkness. Peace. Then your eyes readjust, and you see the mess inside. That’s when the journey really begins.

The Darkness

The trip: One starts coming face to face with the darkest aspects of oneself, and this is far from pleasant. Most people start meditating to become a ‘better’ person, and when they see aspects of themselves that they’ve hated in others, they want to fix everything. It takes a while to realise that this is also just the mind playing games, and to transcend it.

The trap: When you begin to ‘see’ more, it is not just your own flaws, but also those of others that become more visible. If one hasn’t worked enough in the heart, then one can be swept up by the mind, becoming very judgmental, condescending and afraid of all the ‘negative’ people.

So if you feel that you are progressing spiritually and your family is being left behind, your mind is using ‘spiritual growth’ as an excuse to make yourself look bigger than other people. Working with the heart will take you to a more accepting space, and allow you to see God in the ones around you.

The Noise

As you start going deeper into meditation, you could start feeling that you are not meditating at all. The mind goes crazy, thinking thought after thought, and if you have developed enough awareness, you could be very frustrated at the constant running.

And then comes a day when we realise that the frustration was also just a figment of the mind. Beware the mind commenting on the mind commenting on the mind. Take a step back, watch that thought, that is not you, either.

It’s Not All About the Upper Chakras

There seems to be this misconception that an open third eye is a sign of a spiritual person. If someone can talk to the angels, heal other people, predict the future or travel astrally, then it is taken for granted that they are spiritual. This has nothing to do with the truth. These are merely skills and just take a little time to develop.

Without a balance among all the chakras, opening up the third eye will create a lot of physical, mental and emotional turmoil. It is of utmost importance to be deeply rooted. An open heart is very important.

Transcending the Bliss

The trip: Deep meditation can bring flashes or lasting moments of bliss.

The trap: This is not ‘it’ either. One could easily get stuck after a bliss experience, trying to bring that experience back, and judging the ‘success’ of each meditation by the level of bliss experienced. Meditation is about being in the moment. Sometimes those moments are blissful. Sometimes they are pure torture. One is not better than the other, they just are.

Doing and Being

Meditation is the perfect balance between being and doing. However, if there isn’t enough grounding, then one can become heady, loathing tasks and feeling like one is above them. One wants to be left alone, unable to handle the hypocrisy and madness of the world. If this is the case, grounding becomes essential. This is just another gimmick of the mind and also needs to be transcended.

If anything, meditation makes it easier to do more, more easily, because one is not dictated by the likes and dislikes of the mind. Learning to be completely present while performing tasks is very fulfilling and brings more peace to the world, no matter how small a task it is.

Journeying Into Meditation – I

Journeying Into Meditation – I

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Meditation is about being completely present. In that sense, there is no journey. There is no one to make a journey. There just… is. But to come to that realisation – even superficially, takes effort sometimes.

Meditation is a really simple, but fairly difficult process – it involves witnessing your thoughts, but not getting pulled into the drama.

This can be especially hard in the beginning, if you are stuck in a tough situation in life, being pulled apart in various directions as your mind goes crazy. I have found that a little bit of work on the emotions, a little bit of work to reduce the baggage we are carrying, and a little bit of work on mental stability go a long way in helping one meditate more effectively.

Navigating Turbulent Times

The first step in a meditative journey is to take complete responsibility for one’s own emotions. If your map includes a requirement that others change for your peace of mind ( even if it seems like the most reasonable thing to ask for) it means you are giving power away. It is like saying that you refuse to be peaceful until the other person or situation changes. If you feel justified in continuing to feel the way you do, you are going to continue feeling the way you do.

OR you can decide to take responsibility for your own feelings, embrace the other person, warts and all – along with all their egoic, insane, idiotic tendencies. Every label you use for other people is nothing but a figment of your imagination. What may be a monster to you may be an angel to someone else. Let the labels go.

Writing about your feelings helps a lot in the beginning as it helps to sort out the mind. It helps to write exactly what is going on in the mind, and burn the paper afterward. It is important to ensure that we are writing about our feelings and not about what we think others should be doing.

For example, writing ‘why can’t she just stop saying that to me when she knows it hurts me‘ is not very useful. Instead, ‘every time she says that, I feel hurt and insulted and I have no idea if she will ever stop saying these things to me. That is very scary‘. Is very useful because you identify three emotions here – hurt, insult, fear. You don’t have to do anything about these emotions. Just know they are there.

Deep Listening is a very important tool in this process. I recommend it to so many people, and I don’t think I talk about it enough. Unless you learn to listen properly, you cannot really do anything – meditate, heal yourself, be in an honest relationship, be good at your work,.. or even ask for help – because you have no idea (or the wrong idea) what is really wrong.

Breathing is also very powerful. Whenever you feel like your emotions are sweeping you off your feet, lie on your back, or sit up straight and breathe powerfully, without breaks for about 10 minutes. For added effect, join your fingertips together.

You could also breathe into your pain/ emotion. Close your eyes, become deeply aware of the pain and the breath at the same time. Just stay with it, and it will fade away on it’s own.

Grounding is essential. Some really slow yogasanas, gardening, household chores performed with awareness, spending time in nature, all improve grounding. So does meditating on the root.

Many people today are very sensitive. While this means they can pick up psychic information easily, it also means they can easily be traumatised by other people’s energies. This leads to further separation from the universe, because one tends to live in fear instead of love. Grounding balances and strengthens the energies.

Chanting is another very powerful tool.  I have found the Gayatri mantra to be very healing, especially during emotional upheavals. Ganesh mantras are good for grounding. Suryanamaskar, sun mantras and sun gazing are all wonderful for those trying to stand up for themselves and draw boundaries.

Give Up Your Rights: Mooji

Give Up Your Rights: Mooji

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It is not a habit for me to share things I find online, but this was just too beautiful not so share. I found this message by Mooji on facebook recently. Such a beautiful, profound message. Read on.

I am going to tell you something now that you don’t hear very often in the world, and I use myself as an example for you.
If you want to go all the way, give up the sense that you have any rights in life.
Have no right at all. Have no rights for anything.
Then everything is a gift.
When you don’t deserve anything, everything is a gift.
Just try.
Just for you. Okay?

This is not a political decision.
Give up this sense that you have rights, that life owes you something, and feel the space that remains. Maybe, initially, you will feel vulnerability like, ‘Oh my God, I can’t stand up for my rights. I will be abused.’ But go beyond this feeling.
Sacrifice it for a greater truth.
You must begin to think with your God-mind.
God does not have rights.
God does not need any rights.
You have to be like God.
Give up this sense you have rights.
You wish to go all the way?
Give up pride also.
Give up future too.
If you give up future, you give up past also.
Just for you. You don’t have to tell anybody.

And give up this dependency, ‘Who will be here for me?’
And give up projections such as, ‘Yes, in two years time
I will be in a solid relationship and I will own my own apartment.’
There is nothing so great about that.
It just keeps you being a sucker.
You don’t want to be a sucker.
There is greater than this to come.
You miss the full adventure and power
that comes from the Holy spirit if you start to choose for yourself.
If you feel to choose for yourself, He will leave you to choose for yourself.
But as soon as you give up this sense of rights; if you say,
‘You give me the sense of choice. You are my choice,’
then something else will happen.
In the world nobody tells you this.
There you have to be proud and say, ‘Listen, I have rights!’
When I have rights, the world has done me a lot of wrongs.

Give up pride.
Pride in being a woman.
Pride in being beautiful.
Pride in being accomplished in something.
Pride that you are a certain race, religion or nation.
Give up all of these things.
They belong to the devil.
They don’t belong to you.
And experience what remains.

A great space will open inside your Heart.
Huge humility.
Huge acceptance, love, wisdom and freedom as you experience integration with the cosmic being.
And no force on earth can manipulate or bind you, because you have made yourself empty of all that makes a ‘person’.
Why think it is so great to be a person?
For a while we have to taste that state of personhood, but there must come a time when you return to purity.
Come back to your purity, your original being!
You ask, ‘How?’
Collapse at God’s feet. This is no ordinary fall.
It is not falling down.
It is falling upwards into the embrace of the Living God.

~ Mooji