Zen: The Art of Nothing

It seems like another lifetime when I learned Reiki. Life then used to be slow, almost a crawling pace. It all seemed under control, and lessons were learned one at a time. Things started speeding up 2010 onwards, and suddenly what people took a decade to experience, they were experiencing within a year. Those who were prepared, faced a little less trouble than others, but we all faced the music anyway. We’re still facing the music, most of us, aren’t we? Question is, are you just listening, or are you dancing to it?

There cannot be pleasure without pain
Every time I heard the above statement, I knew that it must be true, but I couldn’t really ‘get’ it. So here’s an idea that helped me understand.

Take the example of a dancer. To be a dancer does not mean that you will never fall or never hurt yourself. And yet, a true dancer gives every move his everything, If every dancer occupied his or her time with the pain that dancing brought, or the frustration of it’s rigor, there would be no joy, no pleasure in the dance. A dancer lives in joy because she knows that pain is natural. So is the bliss.

You are in this body (and mind) because the universe wants to experience what it is like, to be YOU. To experience what it feels like, to be happy, sad, angry, calm, frustrated, pleased, ecstatic, desolate, and everything else – as you.

So participate in every moment life brings your way. It may be a tough move, but give it your best and dance anyway. You may not be graceful yet, or the best dancer around, but you’ll learn. And the best part is, you’ll enjoy every moment of it.

Cancer is one of the worst diseases to have afflicted mankind. It isn’t just about affecting one person, and the ordeal doesn’t end when the disease ends. The family goes through intense suffering through physical exertion, multiple visits to the hospitals, the constant fear of losing a loved one, and guilt for not being able to do enough. And even after the disease is cured, IF it is cured, there is the terror of what each follow up check will reveal. It brings up emotions of hatred towards the disease, fear, anger, and what not.

Cancer is a disease, right? It’s something gone awfully wrong, in nature? But have we ever looked at life from the perspective of a cancerous cell? Just imagine. In a body where every cell is bound by it’s duty to the whole body, here’s a cell that decides to break free, to do what it wants. It puts it’s own needs ahead of the needs of the organism.

In the beginning, this is just about freedom, of multiplying it’s own kind. With every subsequent generation, these cells forget that they belong to the organism, and that the health of the organism is critical to their own survival. So very quickly priorities change, and now they start using the organism for their own growth. They now start feeding on the resources meant for other cells. Eventually, they multiply so far and wide, that they choke the free flow of nutrients in the body, damage other organs, and eventually cause death – of the organism, as well as themselves.

Yes.. have we ever looked at life from the perspective of a cancer cell? Now that we see it more clearly, I wonder, have we ever had any other perspective in our own lives? When the organism earth was healthy, every element, every molecule on this planet worked towards the ultimate good of the planet itself. And then one cancerous cell arrived. One human being decided that it was his own needs that were important, and others followed. With every generation, they forgot that they belonged to the earth, and the earth merely became something to own, something to use.

They started feeding on the resources meant for other beings, other parts of earth. Homes of millions of other beings were destroyed, leaving them homeless, to be domesticated, captured or killed if they ventured into human territory.

They have disrupted and polluted the circulation of vital nutrients – rivers have been killed, dammed or redirected to suit the whims and fancies of this species. Oceans have been polluted beyond recognition. Even outer space has not been spared. They care only about themselves, and about furthering their own clan, extending their own life span. Because to them, that is all that matters.

We look at a cancer patient and want to cry, wondering why nature would mete out a punishment this harsh to a soul this gentle. But what if WE are the cancer cell? What if we are the ones growing out of bounds, inching closer everyday to killing a beautiful, divine creation of God?

Cancer is a mere manifestation of the disease that is ripping the planet apart. A few gentle beings reflect this disease in a vain attempt to remind humanity of the disease it has become. If you study the human body carefully, you start to realise that every cell is important, every cell matters. And in this organism, this beautiful, divine earth, you matter. We can sit and ruminate about how mankind has gone haywire, but the critical question remains just this – ARE YOU A CANCER CELL TOO?

It was a while ago, that I decided that I would only write about what I was learning, on facebook as well as here. Not about what I felt others needed to learn. I understand this has its downside; many have been asking me to say something for a while, and everytime I sit down to write something, I realise I have nothing to say. But, it is as it is.

So, I finally have something to say; this is personal, and I’m going to keep it that way. I pray that you find the guidance or help you seek, as you read through it.

I realise now, how I’ve been chasing for a long time. Having been brought up in a spiritual household, chasing was never a good thing, it was always looked down upon. We were still chasing, just in a much subtler way. Chasing money or material wealth was out of question, we had seen beyond that. Family was always the focus. I believe this is how it is anyway, for a lot of Indians – we value families and relationships.

But I see now, how a chase is still just a chase. Doesn’t matter what you are running after, it will leave you gasping and breathless after a while. The material chase is very common all over the world. People are chasing money and power in the blind conviction that it will solve all their problems. They laugh at the ‘lazy’ ones, those who don’t have enough drive to build two houses and buy two cars. The ‘lazy’ ones laugh back at them, because they see through the futility of that chase. You can earn all you like, but no one will cry when you die. All that matters in life is love, friendships and relationships. So that is what they chase, in the belief that if they invested enough in loved ones, they will be happy.

Then there are people who have seen through all of this. Yes, money does not make you happy, and yes, all people are selfish, and it is pointless to expect beyond an extent, from relationships. So they’d rather just chase God. Surely God, or the universe, or whatever else people call it – has the power to make them happy?

I had started seeing already that the spiritual path is not rosy and difficulties lie at every turn. But this one was still an eyeopener. The ‘spiritual’ ones just seem happier because the things that affect ‘normal’ people don’t affect them anymore. But they are still chasing, and they have their own share of disappointments, frustrations and tragedies.

Here’s what I have learned – nothing is going to make you happy forever. And I don’t mean this in a fatalistic way, with a sense of foreboding, the way I have heard it before. It just is as it is. This is life. Some days are going to be happy, some days are going to be sad. Some days you’re going to be wise, some days you’re going to be a complete idiot. Buddhi bhrasht, (messed up head) as we say in our family – a state we always prayed to God to protect us against. It’s all the same, in the end. No state is better than the other. Everything just is. Of course, this is not completely internalised for me yet, but I’m starting to learn.

Eventually all you can do is just surrender – not just to events, many of us do that already, in a bid to ‘not be affected’ by the circumstances – but also to the feelings. We need to feel what we are feeling. Whether we express it or not should still lie with our better judgment as far as possible, but again, if we mess up, it is as it is. There is nowhere to go, nothing to achieve. Things will happen anyway, life moves on and so do we.

Here’s a compilation of the lessons I’ve learned, from a practical perspective.
Stay in the present: Meditation isn’t about sitting for half an hour trying not to think. It is a moment-to-moment state of being. That half hour practice is great too, but it is just as important to remain vigilant towards our selves throughout the day. What am I thinking, what am I feeling? One thought or feeling isn’t better than the other, they are all just there and will pass.

Remember to feel what you’re feeling: Feelings are just feelings. They don’t make you a good or bad person. Every situation in life brings associated emotions with it, and it is ok to feel whatever you are feeling, whether it is wanting to eat that extra laddu or wanting to kill someone. Separate feeling from expression. It is ok to feel. Expression brings consequences. Feel. Express if it makes sense to you.

These are tough times, stay in the heart: Breathe the energies in and out of the heart as much as possible. Do it when things go wrong, do it as a meditation, whatever you like. But keep your attention on the heart at all times.