Every once in a while, life places us at crossroads, and we have to choose which direction we want the remainder of our life to head. These choices are often quite tough, and the dilemma leaves many a mind distressed.

One such distressed soul recently posed some questions to us.
1) How should one know what is good for him, when he finds himself left with 2 options and both of them go in completely opposite directions?
2) How much importance should one give to others happiness when its on the cost of his own?
3) How to remove the fickleness of mind and make it steady and firm to his decisions?
4) What are the grounds or factors upon which one should take the major decisions of life?
5) How do we get confidence in our own decisions?
Life always presents us with tough choices, to test what we have learned so far. Often such situations leave us completely confused, as we have to choose between conflicting interests.

The first thing to do here, would be to prioritize. Here you will have to fight your fickle-mindedness first, which you can do with regular meditation.

Take some time to steady your mind, think about it and then see what is the most important to you. This is help you decide the direction in which you want to head. Obviously you will have to compromise on some things, but then, life does not give you all the things you want. There has to be a trade-off somewhere. This answers the first and third questions.

2) How much importance should one give to others happiness when its on the cost of his own?
It is always your own happiness you think about. Even as you wonder whether you should worry about others’ happiness, you are really thinking only about yourself. If bringing sorrow to your loved ones will bring you pain, it is something to think about again.

Regarding others’ happiness, remember this. If the matter to decide concerns only you, then you need not worry about others. But if it concerns them too, then you might have to consult them. In things like marriage, it is really your decision alone, because you and not them, will have to spend the rest of your life with the person.

4) What are the grounds or factors upon which one should take the major decisions of life?
Major decisions should be taken keeping in mind your progress as a person. The path that will help you change for the better, is the best path to take. Unfortunately, people base these decisions on factors like lust, money and power, which do not last and bring misery in the long run.

5) How do we get confidence in our own decisions?
You can have the confidence by having faith in your destiny. As long as you have based your decision on what you think is right, and not based them on greed or fear, life will always side you. Once a decision is made, one must forget about the other option completely, and never compare, for the grass always looks greener on the other side, but seldom is, in reality. One must focus on making the best of the current situation instead of thinking of one might have lost.